RICK'S TUESDAY NIGHT BLOG
It all started with dinner. Our Tuesday night beach bash here in Mexico. With a soundtrack of rock and rock-ish hits provided by our Mexican hosts, dinner began with some extraordinary soup made with pork sausage and ham. So much swine-generated goodness in one bowl! It exploded with flavor on my tongue. Then it was time for some flank steak with rice. The steak was tender, juicy and flavorful. Yum! What more could I want? I know, a small piece of grouper! It was flakey, grilled to perfection and ACH! ACH! WTF? MY THROAT IS CLOSING UP!!!
This was a first. I've never had an allergic reaction to food before. I don't recommend it. I didn't understand what was happening. My throat closed up while I still had a mouthful of grouper. Instead of spitting it out like a normal person, I forced it down my throat just as my esophageal sphincter was swelling shut. That bite was like the last chopper out of Saigon. Nothing would be leaving my mouth in that direction for some time.
I didn't want to make a scene so I tried sitting there quietly as Betsy from Fox World Travel raced to her room to retrieve her Benadryl. Several listeners, not knowing what was going on, came over and sat next me, telling me stories of their day's drunken shenanigans. All I could do was nod and try not to cover them in the copious amounts of saliva my body was producing. I think they just thought I was too drunk to talk or caught up the mesmerizing beat of the song "Maneater" pulsating from the resort speakers.
Finally, Betsy arrived like Florence Nightingale in a polo shirt and cargo shorts bearing the life-saving Benadryl. As the throat swelling begin to subside, my travel companion, whom we'll call
Zoey (because I'm getting sick of calling her Amy but that's her name), asked me if there's anything she could do for me. With my face still flush from discomfort and my vocal chords still traumatized and raw, I peered into her eyes and croaked as best I could, "Please, whatever you do, just promise me you will not let me die listening to Hall and Oates".