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may 31st 2012
10. Overpowering smell that comes with changing dirty diapers doesn’t seem that bad to new parents who’ve spent their lives living downwind of Kaukauna.

9. No matter how dumb your kid is, their third grade composition will seem like the work of Shakespeare after you’ve been reading the Post Crescent.

8. Driving around town pointing out all the bars, fun way to teach them to count to over a hundred.

7. No better way to demonstrate to a child the meaning of the phrase “time is money” than plugging quarters into downtown parking meters. 

6. They learn a healthy respect for the law by watching their parents drive carefully past police cruisers after they’ve had a couple beers.

5. Children are reminded to eat a healthy breakfast like a bowl of Rice Krispies every time they see Mayor Hanna who has started looking like Snap, Crackle and Pop’s grandfather.


4. Number of bars that have darts, pool, foosball, ski-ball and illegal gambling machines makes it feel like there’s a Chuck E. Cheese but without an underpaid kid in a stinky rat costume on nearly every block.

3. If they’re nearly beaten to death, Appleton’s mayor WILL count it as a violent crime.

2. Reading Outagamie County signs supporting Scott Walker good way to teach children how to NOT spell the word “governor”.

1. The Catholic church transferring fewer rapey priests to the area.
posted by: Rick and Len at 9:57 am Comment On This Post

may 29th 2012
SMALL TOWN CRIME WAVE 5.29.12



May 27th Village of Bowler
Sheriff’s deputies received a report of a guest at The Konkapot lodge on Highway A who made off with a pillow from the lobby and a large stuffed beaver.

May 6th City of Green Bay
Police dealt with a fight between two inmates at the Brown County Jail. The two men, ages 22 and 27, were reportedly arguing over a gambling debt involving desserts.

May 14th City of Waukesha
A male subject, about 65 years old, was believed to be deceased after he was reportedly “hanging upside down from a split rail fence” for about an hour. Police responded and determined that the man hanging upside down from the fence was merely intoxicated, alive and not injured.

May 21st Village of Cecil
The Sheriff’s Department received a call from an Illinois man who claimed he had purchased 20 brats from a Cecil gas station and when he got home to Chicago, he discovered they were rotten. The clerk at the gas station told an investigating deputy that he hadn’t sold 20 brats at a time to anyone that day. According to the dispatcher, when the man first called, he was pretending to be his aunt.

May 21st Village of Birnamwood
Loose chickens were reported just off West Kildeer Lane. According to reports, the loose chickens strayed into a neighbor’s yard when the neighbor began shooting them with a 22. Deputies described the problem between the neighbors as “on-going”.

May 20th Village of Gresham
Police are investigating reports of an underage drinking party.  According to the Sheriff’s Department, one parent indicted their  daughter came up “all hicky-ed up”.

May 16th City of Waukesha
Police responded to a report of two women in a Ford Focus driving down East Moreland Avenue with a life size inflatable sex doll hanging out the driver side window.
posted by: Rick and Len at 11:02 am Comment On This Post

may 24th 2012
DC comics has announced that one of their long time superheros is gay. Which one? Let's take a look?



BATMAN…wouldn’t be caught dead wearing a utility belt that didn’t match his shoes.

ROBIN…Always preferred sliding down the Bat Pole to yodeling in the Bat Cave.

AQUAMAN…His ability to breath underwater always puts him at the top of the invitation list to Elton John’s annual pool party.

GREEN LANTERN…The only other guy ever this obsessed with flashy rings was Liberace.

PLASTIC MAN…Frequently uses his shape-shifting power to turn into Ricky Martin’s Speedo.

THE FLASH…Has used his supersonic speed to get first in line for tickets to see Liza Minnelli.

SUPERMAN…His only weakness…green kryptonite…and young Latino men in tight shorts.
posted by: Rick and Len at 11:06 am Comment On This Post

may 21st 2012
April 25th Village of Sauk City
A resident called 911 threatening suicide. However, when an  officer made contact with the woman she told him she couldn’t remember why she called 911 and said she was mad that her apartment was messy. She also asked the officer to get her a can of Pepsi from the fridge.

May 10th City of St. Francis
A 23 year old man was arrested trying to shoplift a tube Man-Delay Maximum Strength Climax Control Male Desensitizing Gel from Pick N Save. The man, who was shopping with his girlfriend at the time, tried to conceal the theft from her.

May 9th City of Germantown
Police were called to assist with a disorderly student and parent at Kennedy Middle School. Upon officers’ arrival it was determined that neither the student nor his mother was being disorderly; the mother just did not agree with the three-day, out-of-school suspension her son received for spraying “fart” spray inside the school.

May 4th City of Neenah
A complainant o Professional Plaza reported that a resident was smoking marijuana in an apartment. Police responded but only smelled an air freshener.

May 12th City of Portage
An Armstrong Street caller contacted police to report someone entered their residence and stole their lizards.

May 6th City of Glendale
A 20-year-old man was arrested for stealing three items valued at $308 from Kohl’s. The man allegedly hid three shirts in his jeans. That man told police he needed a new shirt for “a special occasion” and couldn’t decide which of three he liked best so he stole all three.

May 4th City of Cudahy
A 22-year-old woman was arrested for disorderly conduct after she confronted a she claims was talking poorly about her. During the incident, the woman, who was armed with a can opener, got into a physical fight with another woman, who is nine-months pregnant.

May 14th Village of Aniwa
Police were called to West Lake Street where a man was reportedly acting like he was going to attack his neighbor who as mowing his own lawn. The police dispatcher indicated to officers that the neighbor made like he was going to kick the lawn mowers ass twice. The lawn mower told police he had about 20 minutes before he was finished and the neighbor was now just staring at him.

May 16th City of Shawano
Officers responded to an Acorn Street residence where a neighbor boy reportedly hurled a cement block at another boy. The dispatcher noted that the block thrower "swears all the time and uses the F-word and is evil."

May 16th City of Portage
Police on Brady Street discovered someone used spray paint to write “butt head” on the road.

April 8th Village of Sauk City
Police responded to a panicked 911 call in which a female voice screamed for an ambulance over loud music in the background. When police arrived they found a drunk man passed out on a bar stool inside the bar. A nearly equally intoxicated nursing student said she couldn’t find a pulse on him and didn’t think he was breathing, so she called 911. The man was breathing and was awakened. He did not want assistance.

May 15th Town of Russell
A man called the Lincoln County Sheriff’s Department to report someone broke into his garage and stole a 50 pound bag of sunflower seeds. An investigation by Sheriff’s Deputies revealed that the culprit was a bear who dragged the bag of seeds into nearby woods. The bear remains at large.

May 17th Village of Nekoosa
An officer responded to a report of a vehicle swerving all over the road. The officer discovered the driver was not drunk but rather was just unfamiliar with the area.

May 2nd City of Oak Creek
A caller told police that he and a friend were talking in a parked car when a tall, muscular man dressed in a black robe and wearing a white “Scream” mask walked out of the fog and up to his car, stood outside it for a moment, slowly backed away, then turned, crouched behind some bushes for a moment and eventually walked away. The caller told police he was unsure if it was a prank and did not know who would want to prank him.

April 29th City of Wisconsin Rapids
A Grove Avenue woman reported seven children trying to push over a portable bathroom.

May 4th City of Waukesha
A woman called police to report her 17-year-old son threw a pillow at her, almost breaking her nose.
posted by: Rick and Len at 12:24 pm Comment On This Post

may 17th 2012
Comic Shane Mauss returns to the Rick and Len Show Friday morning at 8. You can see Shane tonight through Saturday at Skyline Comedy Cafe in Appleton. Tonight, Thursday, is WAPL Night. Just enter "WAPL" for the coupon code at www.Skylinecomedy.com and get 2 for 1 admission tonight only! Check out his most recent appearance on Conan!

posted by: Rick and Len at 12:27 pm Comment On This Post

may 17th 2012
THINGS YOU’D USE TO BLIND YOURSELF WITH RATHER THAN CHOOSING BETWEEN LOOKING AT THE OCTOMOM PORNO OR A NAKED MAGAZINE LAYOUT OF THE TANNING BED MOM.

10. The 10-foot pole women wouldn’t touch Rick with.

9. Enough bleach to disinfect they entire cast of the Jersey Shore.

8. A dull straight razor. (that one particularly for fans of early 20th century surrealist Spanish filmmaking.)

7. Eye socket sized stainless steel melon-baller.

6. Rusty fishing lure with dirty Eagle Claw treble hook.

5. The needle of a syringe you found dangling from Courtney Love’s bony arm.

4. Same ice pick you used to chip off a few cubes to make yourself a drink you incorrectly thought would be strong enough to get those naked images out of your head.

3. Ralphie’s Official Red Ryder Carbine-Action Two-Hundred-Shot Range Model Air Rifle from A Christmas Story.

2. One of those long, metal poles they stick in a chicken’s ass to make it go around on a rotisserie.

1. The sharp pointy tip of one of the Kardashian sister’s dunce caps.
posted by: Rick and Len at 11:35 am Comment On This Post

may 14th 2012
SMALL TOWN CRIME WAVE 5.14.12



May 6th City of Oak Creek

A 54-year-old man was cited for lewd and lascivious behavior after officers found him naked from the waist down after responding to his 911 call. The man was intoxicated and called 911 multiple times, stating his wife had stolen his underwear and pants. He also was cited for misuse of emergency telephone numbers and was advised that his missing shorts were not a police matter.

May 6th City of Shawano

Sheriff’s deputies responded to a call from a Loon Lake residence where they found a man drunk and wandering around outside wearing only a towel  According to the police report, the man was throwing his wallet and exhibiting angry behavior since returning from a trip to the casino.

May 12th Town of Easton

A deputy was called to a location just east of Wausau where a a farmer reported a car in his field. When the deputy got to the scene, he found the car stuck in the field, and a man attempting to free it. The man was naked from the waist down, and had been covering himself and the car with mud. The man was agitated and resisted the deputy. After using his Taser, the deputy arrested the man without incident. The man did not explain to police why he was in the field, had covered himself in mud or had taken off his pants. According to a  Marathon County Sheriff’s Lieutenant,  "Something weird was going on there".

April 22nd City of Green Bay

A 29-year-old man was issued a citation for "dog napping," for taking a 7-month-old Chihuahua named Prince he found on South Platten Street. The dog’s owner spoke to the man but he refused to give the dog back and said it ran away. The “napped” dog later was found at the Bay Area Humane Society shelter and police plan to return it to its rightful owner.

May 11th City of Wisconsin Rapids

An employee at Wal-Mart requested an officer walk through the store because there was a large number of children both inside the store and flying kites in the parking lot.

May 8th Village of Bonduel

A South Jefferson Street woman called police to report that a woman keeps sending her text messages telling her she’s lazy and acting like a baby.



May 8th City of Wisconsin Rapids

An employee at Checkers called police to report a female driver just went through the drive thru but did not order because she apparently just wanted to make an obscene gesture at the cashier.

May 3rd City of Glendale

A 21-year-old woman was arrested for theft at Kohl’s. The woman admitted taking jewelry valued at $47 but was angry when arrested because “all her friends do it,” some even “make a living” doing it and they don’t get caught.

posted by: Rick and Len at 3:35 pm Comment On This Post