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jun 29th 2012
We are proud to name as this week’s Rick and Len Show WEENIE OF THE WEEK…

24-year-old Joseph Berres of Plymouth who allegedly had several run-ins with police over last weekend. Among the items in Berres reported one man crime spree….

He got into an altercation with a man on Eastern Avenue in Plymouth and threatened him with a metal pole.

He created a disturbance outside a bar by loudly yelling and swearing.

And he allegedly exposed his genitals to a woman in the toy aisle at the Plymouth Wal-Mart.

So,

For not understanding that it’s supposed to be the prices that are falling at Wal-Mart…not the customer’s pants.

For not realizing that the popular peopleofwalmart.com is not an X-rated web site.

And for hanging out in an aisle jammed with toys but, based on press reports, apparently the only thing he could find to play with was his penis.

We are proud to name Joseph Berres of Plymouth as this week’s Rick and Len Show….WEENIE OF THE WEEK.
posted by: Rick and Len at 11:31 am Comment On This Post

jun 26th 2012
A man who hangs around New York’s Central Park dressed as Elmo, the lovable Sesame Street character, was handcuffed by New York City cops Sunday and whisked away in an ambulance after he launched into one of his trademark anti-Semitic rants. The unidentified man in the Elmo costume was removed from the vicinity of the Central Park Zoo, where he has alternately posed for photos with park visitors, screamed curses, and launched into diatribes about assorted Jewish conspiracies



OTHER SHOCKING REVELATIONS ABOUT THE MUPPETS

10. Big Bird…hangs out at waysides begging burly truckers to pluck him hard.

9. Animal…a debilitating head injury made him a vegetable before dying and becoming a mineral.

8. Elmo…Forget the tickling…only thing that makes him giggle is his annual prostate exam.

7. Dr. Bunson Honeydew…charged with unintentional manslaughter after Beeker was killed in an explosion in his illegal meth lab.

6. Cookie Monster…a group of Girl Scout accused him of inappropriately touching their Dose-Se-Does.

5. Kermit…has dangerously high cholesterol caused by 30 years of eating pork.

4. Ernie…left Bert for brief, torrid affair with Ricky Martin.

3. Oscar the Grouch…was recently arrested for soliciting a undercover officer to stick things in his can.

2. The Swedish Chef…was actually born in Kenya, yet despite pleas from Donald Trump refuses to release actual birth certificate.

1. Fozzie Bear…chunks of a couple hikers who went missing in Yellowstone found in his stool.
posted by: Rick and Len at 2:05 pm Comment On This Post

jun 25th 2012


May 31st City of Menasha
Police responded to a report of a dispute between a man and a woman on Third Street. The woman told police that the man became upset when she wouldn’t get the salt shaker for the man’s egg salad sandwich.

June 16th City of Portage
Police were called to an apartment to take care of a large bug in the living area. Responding officers say they could not find the offending bug.

June 9th City of Glendale
Police responded to a report of a naked man standing in the grass “whipping a string around”.

June 10th City of Waupun
A man at Family Dollar called police to report an irate 73-year-old customer was throwing bags of merchandise at him because the customer didn’t get something for the price he wanted.

June 17th Town of Wescott
Shawano County Sheriff’s Deputies responded to a report from North Bay Circle where a 50-year-old couple was sitting outside naked.  

June 10th City of Waukesha
A resident called police to report  “male  screaming and two other males filleting a fish on the trunk of a car and dropping fish guts on the street”.

June 7th Village of Sauk City
A resident reported a man was passed out in the bushes. Police made contact with the 24-year-old man, who thought he was at home in bed.

June 19th City of Wisconsin Rapids
A caller told police his car sustained damage to the rear driver’s side when a naked man threw a yield sign at him.

June 7th Village of Sauk City
A resident reported that six juveniles were misbehaving on the Spruce Street Elementary School playground equipment. The resident told police one boy was going down the slide wearing only his boxer shorts.

June 15th City of Wisconsin Rapids
A man requested police assistance after his young daughter locked herself to a coat rack with handcuffs.

June 19th Town of Greenville
Employees of an area retail shop called the Outagamie County Sheriff’s Department to report a man who stops in the store wearing only a T-shirt and Speedo. After speaking with a deputy, the man agreed his attire probably wasn’t the best choice and he would dress more appropriately if he returned to the store.

June 10th City of Waukesha
Police received a report of a 50-year-old man who was “passed out and covered with mulberries”.

June 18th City of Menomonee Falls
Police charged a 56-year-old woman for allegedly attacking her husband after she found publications she considered to be pornography in the trunk of his car. The two “pornographic” publications she discovered were the Milwaukee alternative weekly newspaper the Shepherd Express and the satirical newspaper The Onion.
posted by: Rick and Len at 12:57 pm Comment On This Post

jun 15th 2012
WEENIE OF THE WEEK 6.15.12



We are proud to name as this week’s Rick and Len Show Weenie of the Week…Green Bay Alderman Tim De Wane, who this past Friday, pled guilty to a disorderly conduct citation. Alderman De Wane, who had been in office less than a month, was arrested April 28th after he knocked on a stranger’s door on at 1am, and for 15 minutes, repeatedly asked the man to let him in. When police arrived, they reportedly found Alderman De Wane stumbling around, smelling of alcohol and  his pants soaked with urine. He was allegedly unable to sit up in the back seat of the squad car. According to the police report, when the female officer, who Alderman De Wane kept calling “Honey”, told him he was under arrest for disorderly conduct, he replied, “Good luck with that”.  A Breathalyzer showed the alderman’s blood-alcohol content to be .221

So,

For proving, against all conventional wisdom, that there is something a politician can do that’s even more annoying that robo-calling your house 10 times a day.

For apparently thinking that being in office for almost a month allows him to make the jump from being wet behind the ears to wetting other parts of his anatomy.

And for not understanding that elected officials should not be stumbling around the streets of Green Bay drunk and barely coherent… that’s what Lambeau Field is for…[Cue Tommy Thompson!]

We are proud to Green Bay Alderman Tim De Wane as this week’s Rick and Len Show…WEENIE OF THE WEEK!
posted by: Rick and Len at 10:33 am Comment On This Post

jun 13th 2012
May 26th City of Neenah
A motorist at the intersection of Breezewood Lane and U.S. 41 asked police to check on a turtle that was in the middle of a roundabout. A car ran over the turtle before an officer arrived. The officer disposed of the body after a short memorial service.

May 31st City of Franklin
A 34-year-old man was arrested for shoplifting a Motorola Bluetooth earpiece at Wal-Mart. The man stole the earpiece by wrapping it in toilet paper and sticking it inside his rectum.

May 24th City of Horicon
A caller notified police of seeing people riding on top of a mattress on top of a car. The driver, a 19-year-old woman, told police two men were sitting on the windows of the car holding the mattress on the top to move it.

June 5th City of Waupun
A caller on Hillyer Street told police there was a large snapping turtle in the road and some children were trying to play with it and he was concerned with their safety. Police told the children to leave the turtle alone.

May 31st City of Oak Creek
A 41-year-old man called police after employees at a restaurant refused to give him a refund for a rib dinner he was unsatisfied with.

June 5th City of Beaver Dam
A woman on DeClark Street called police to report someone had been throwing gnomes at her political signs.

June 1st City of Portage
Police investigated a report of an intoxicated man who was out of control and broke a rosary.

May 31st Town of Leopolis
A caller reported seeing two people walking on the snowmobile and believed they were suspicious because one was wearing all black while the other was wearing all black except for a white hat. They told police they thought the two might be up to no good or perhaps they’re just taking a walk.

June 5th City of Shawano
Police received a report of a potential scam. The caller reported receiving a call from someone identifying themselves as working for the Shriner’s Circus. When they agreed to make a $20 donation, they were instructed to write a check and leave it under their doormat. The caller thought this seemed suspicious.

May 23rd City of Glendale
A 15-year-old girl was arrested for disorderly conduct for spitting at the driver of a county bus. The girl was angry when she and other juveniles boarded the bus with expired transfers and were told they had to pay or exit. A large amount of spit was found on a window next to the driver. The girl denied spitting but admitted sneezing saying the spit might have come out accidentally when she sneezed.

May 23rd City of Bayside
A 23-year-old woman was arrested for drunken driving after she ran from the car into a lot, telling police she had to pee. She also said she was driving because her friend was too drunk to drive. At first, she refused to take a breath test but changed her mind because she was just curious to see what her blood alcohol content was. Turns out it was 0.15, almost twice the legal limit.

June 6th City of Wisconsin Rapids
An employee at Rapids Rental and Supply called police to report an irrational customer had threatened to cut the store displays in half with a chain saw.

May 15th City of Green Bay
An 18-year-old man was cited by police after he took a needle from a $1.99 six-pack of needles at Mill’s Fleet Farm West. The man said it was a stupid decision but he was just going to use the needle to pierce his ears.

May 3rd City of Wisconsin Rapids
A woman called police to report a man would not return her Season 1, Disc 1, of The Dukes of Hazard.

May 3rd Village of Biron
A man called police an deported someone took the newspaper out of his mailbox in. An investigating officer learned the man didn’t subscribe to the paper and when the route driver realized she had inadvertently put it in his box, she took it back.
posted by: Rick and Len at 2:41 pm Comment On This Post

jun 12th 2012
A woman in Columbus, Ohio is suing the city because they impounded her 2002 Saturn after an accident and won’t return it. She is demanding 500 BILLION DOLLARS in damages.

TOP TEN FEATURES THAT WOULD MAKE A CAR WORTH 500 BILLION DOLLARS

10. Cigarette lighter is a topless hottie with a great rack wielding a 18K gold Zippo.

9. Seat not only warms your butt but wipes it as well.

8. There’s an honest lawyer in the trunk…and those are so rare one must be worth at least a couple hundred billion.

7. Ballistic missile launcher for dealing with overly aggressive tailgaters or Illinois drivers.

6. Upholstered seats made entirely from tough, leathery skin of crazy tanning mom.

5. Every time you honk your horn it magically takes 10 seconds off the life of a Kardashian.

4. It’s made entirely from spare parts of Bill Gates and Warren Buffett.

3. Every time you blow a gasket, it blows you back.

2. Has a unique internal combustion engine that eschews gas in favor of running on infinite supply of crushed dreams of disappointed Cubs fans.

1. Has a radio that not only filters out political ads but also has no 101.1.
posted by: Rick and Len at 4:39 pm Comment On This Post

jun 7th 2012
A guy in Manchester, New Hampshire was robbed while wearing a chicken suit. What kind of guys robs a dude dressed like a chicken? How little self-respect does this guy have as a criminal? To help you avoid making the same mistake, here’s the…

TOP TEN THINGS TO ASK YOURSELF BEFORE ROBBING A GUY IN A CHICKEN SUIT



10. How do you think a guy busted for robbing a kid in a chicken suit will do in prison?

9. Do you want to get charged with “fowl play”?

8. Does he know the 11 secret herbs and spices.

7. If this goes wrong, am I okay being known as the guy who got the stuffing beat out of him by some dude dressed like Big Bird’s special needs cousin?

6. How much money could a guy who makes a living impersonating poultry really be carrying?

5. How long until the Statue of Liberty woman is back outside the tax place?

4. If I throttle him during the robbery, will I be charged with choking the chicken in public?

3. Is he concealing a gun in his egg hole?

2. What’s more embarrassing? Wearing a chicken suit? Robbing a guy wearing a chicken suit. Or getting your ass kicked by Scott Walker twice in less than two years?

1. Will I fry for this?
posted by: Rick and Len at 4:17 pm Comment On This Post

jun 5th 2012
May 28th Village of Ashwaubenon
The 34-year-old man fired several rounds through his garage wall. One bullet hit the window of a nearby apartment on Pilgrim Way. The man told police he had recently purchased a .380 caliber handgun with the intent to apply for a concealed carry permit. He said he didn’t know anything about guns but wanted to try it out before class.



May 29th City of Oshkosh
Police responded to a call from an employee of the Nails Plus Salon on South Koeller Street after a deer strolled in through the open front door, startling both the staff and customers.

May 12th City of Menasha
A woman reported that someone stole her Blessed Virgin Mary statue from the front of her apartment building. Family members checked the neighborhood, but there was no Virgin to be found.

May 24th City of Oak Creek
Police responded to a report of a goat at large. An officer found the goat nibbling grass and tied the goat to a stake in the ground at its residence and left a note for its owner, who was not at home at the time the goat escaped.

May 22nd City of Franklin
A caller reported the theft of $300 by a woman he invited into his residence. The caller told police he paid $300 to a woman he met at a local gentlemen’s club to dance for him at his home, and when she went outside to have a cigarette she left without dancing for him.

May 20th City of Waukesha
A woman called police to report that her 18-year daughter is “acting up and throwing things and stole her mother’s cat.”

May 21st City of Waukesha
A caller reported “a verbal altercation with her brother … about toilet paper”. “They were advised, if they can’t get along, they need to not live together.

May 26th City of Wauwatosa
A 30-year-old man was taken to Froedtert Hospital to get stitches on his chin after he was tackled behind Longfellow Middle. The man and his friend were tossing a football around when another man whom they didn’t know asked if he could join in. After a few throws, he tackled the other man then punched him in the face. The two friends chased him until the suspect ran into traffic.

May 31st City of Shawano
A woman called 911 from a soccer game at Eberlein Park to report a man who always parks his vehicle on the wrong side of the barricades. The woman was informed that the 9-1-1 line is intended for emergencies and a person parking on the wrong side of a barricade at a children’s soccer game does not qualify as an emergency.

May 18th Town of Harrison
Police responded to a report of a mother on Easter Lily Drive who used orange traffic cones to block her street so her kids could ride their motorized vehicles on the road. The cones were removed and the mother was spoken to.

May 19th City of Chilton
Police received a report of a man in dark clothing laying on the sidewalk near the intersection of Irish Road and Calumet Street. Responding officers found there was no medical issue. The man was just lying in the middle of the sidewalk to get some sun.
posted by: Rick and Len at 10:03 am Comment On This Post

jun 1st 2012
WEENIE OF THE WEEK/COCKTAIL FRANK 6.1.12

Some weeks, there is someone who is not quite as big a weenie as someone else. They’re our Weenie of the Week runner up. Our…

COCKTAIL FRANK

We are proud to name as this week’s Rick and Len Show Cocktail Frank…Diane Hendricks, Wisconsin’s richest woman (worth reportedly 2.8 Billion dollars) who, this week it was revealed by the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel, manipulated the system to pay ABSOLUTELY NOTHING in Wisconsin state income taxes for 2010.

So,

For apparently thinking she doesn’t have to pay taxes since looking at herself in the mirror is already taxing enough.

For taking that the old axiom that the only things that are certain in life is death and taxes and apparently going to extreme measures to avoid both.

For paying no state income taxes for 2010. NONE,  NOTHING, NADA, NAUGHT, ZILCH, ZIP, ZERO, GOOSE EGG, DIDDLY SQUAT. I’d go on but I can’t afford a thesaurus because I paid my income taxes!

We are proud to name Wisconsin’s Richest woman, Diane Hendricks, who paid no state income taxes in 2010 as this week’s Rick and Len Cocktail Frank.

WEENIE OF THE WEEK

We are proud to name as this week’s Rick and Len Show Weenies of the Week…overzealous Brewer fans who have been posting hateful and threatening messages on Facebook directed at Brewers catcher Jonathan Lucroy’s wife. Lucroy, for those who don’t know, sustained an injury this week when his wife accidentally knocked over a suitcase onto his right hand while he was reaching for a lost sock under his bed. As a result, Lucroy’s expected to be on the disabled list for 4 to 6 weeks.

So,

For directing all their anger and frustration at Lucroy’s wife when the real culprits, the suitcase and the sock are getting a free ride.

For proving there’s a difference between being a member of the True Blue Brew Crew and a member of the Dumb Ass Low Class.

For not understanding that accidents do happen…which is ironic, since I’d be willing to bet the reason most of them are even here is their father’s didn’t pull out fast enough.

We are proud to name the Brewer fans posting hateful and threatening messages on Facebook directed at Brewers catcher Jonathan Lucroy’s wife as this week’s Rick and Len Show…WEENIES OF THE WEEK!
posted by: Rick and Len at 4:57 pm Comment On This Post

jun 1st 2012
A man in Brown County is in trouble for allegedly giving his dog cocaine. As a public service, here are the….

SIGNS YOUR DOG MIGHT HAVE A DRUG PROBLEM

If it spends more time licking it’s lips than it’s balls…your dog might have a drug problem.

Instead of demanding “Kibbles n Bits, Kibble and Bits”…it demands “a couple a hits, a couple of hits”…your dog might have a drug problem.

If it finally caught that damn chuck wagon, and then sold it for scrap to get money for an eight ball…your dog might have a drug problem.

If instead of fetching a rolled up newspaper it only fetches a rolled up fatty…your dog might have a drug problem.

If it’s nose is runnier than it’s bowel movements…your dog might have a drug problem.

If it’s behaving more irrationally than Mel Gibson at a bar mitzvah …your dog might have a drug problem.

If his first name is “Snoop”…your dog might have a drug problem.

(With apologies to comic Doug Stanhope) If it’s eyes are redder than the water in the swimming pool during the 4th week of Lillith Fair…your dog might have a drug problem. (credit to Doug Stanhope for that one)

If it’s heart is beating harder than the fists of a guy pummeling Tom Barrett at the state fair…your dog definitely has  a drug problem!

posted by: Rick and Len at 4:50 pm Comment On This Post