HOW THE SWINE FLU EPIDEMIC IS EFFECTING CELEBRITIES.
Paula Abdul--is more than likely protected against the virus because she almost certainly took some Tamiflu while downing everything else in the pharmacy before her weekly Idol broadcasts.
Michael Jackson--has started wearing a respiratory face mask over the respiratory face mask he already wears.
Mel Gibson--in a effort to avoid all pork products,is converting to Judaism.
Michael Phelps--to avoid the disease, is only inhaling air that has passed through a water filled cylindrical glass filtration device.
The Octomom--while not especially at risk for the Swine Flu, is nonetheless having the germs implanted in her body in hopes that the disease will bring her even more media attention.
Brett Favre--is coming back out of retirement because he knows that if the disease kills any family members during the season at least he'll have a great game.
Scarlett Johannson--is avoiding all contact with anyone who has visited Mexico in the last 6 months. At least that's why Rick assumes she hasn't answered any of his love letters.