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jul 30th 2012
So it’s the 30th Olympics, or as it’s displayed on my cable listings “The XXX Olympic Games”. You can imagine my disappointment when I tuned in, and they weren’t triple X at all. So, here’s our suggestions on….

WAYS TO MAKE THE XXX OLYMPICS MORE XXX

10. Instead of their necks, have male winners hang their medals from a different appendage.

9. Following women’s table tennis matches, winner gets to use their paddle to spank the loser for being a naughty, naughty girl.

8. Ban long fiberglass sticks and make pole vaulting a competition between Ron Jeremy and Tommy Lee.

7. Replace modern pentathlon with modern penetrationthon.

6. Combine men’s and women’s relay races, run them naked and hey, ouch, that’s not a baton.

5. Show entire women’s beach volleyball matches in slow motion with porn music.

4. Require athletes in all events to grunt like the women’s tennis players.

3. Add 50 gallons of Jello to all women’s wrestling events.

2. During badminton matches have female announcer who uses low sexy voice every time she says the word “shuttlecock”.

1. Make women’s kayaking less about rowing and more about paddling the pink canoe.
posted by: Rick And Len at 3:51 pm Comment On This Post

jul 27th 2012
WEENIE OF THE WEEK 7.27.12



We are proud to name as this week’s Rick and Len Show Weenies of the Week…the Milwaukee Brewers bullpen who this week gave up late inning leads three games in a row contributing to the team’s now 7 game losing streak.

So…

For struggling more than a Ben Roethlisberger date.

For dropping more ugly ones than the octomom’s uterus.

And for blowing more leads than a desperate salesperson with soft lips.

We are proud to name the Milwaukee Brewers bullpen as this week’s Rick and Len Show…WEENIES OF THE WEEK.
posted by: Rick And Len at 10:42 am Comment On This Post

jul 13th 2012
This week, the Post Crescent claimed that they unraveled the mystery of a UFO was spotted over Fox Cities stadium last Saturday. They say it was just fireworks. Like space aliens wouldn’t be drawn to Grand Chute. We disagree. In fact, we think there’s 10….

REASONS UFOS WOULD COME TO GRAND CHUTE

10. Big summer sale on alien size panties at the Dress Barn.

9. Drawn by the mouthwatering aroma of  burning Italian food from last week’s Bucca de Beppo fire.

8. Didn’t have enough change for the meters to park their spaceship in Appleton.

7. They were looking for their leader, a humanoid with grayish complexion and enormous, oversized head, and didn’t realize they’d overshot the Fox 11 studio by 30 miles.

6. They were looking for other alien life forms and figured there was no better place to start than Wal-Mart.

5. There is no #5. It was abducted by space aliens.

4. Thought somebody was signaling them but it was just the sun reflecting off our news honey, Jeanne Anthony’s freshly Armor-Alled face.

3, While looking for perfect place to land, spotted large red bull’s-eye on Fox River Mall.

2. Needed a Grand Chute because the Little Chute wasn’t big enough for the anal probe.

1. Hey, they were searching for signs of intelligent life. Where were they going to land? Sheboygan?
posted by: Rick And Len at 2:48 pm Comment On This Post

jul 13th 2012
WEENIE OF THE WEEK 7.13.12



We are proud to name as this week’s Rick and Len Weenie of the Week…a 32 year old Damien Kindt who this week racked up his 5th DUI when he allegedly rear-ended a stopped police car on Green Bay’s west side.

So,

For getting 5 DUIs, proving he is a man who learns so well from his own mistakes he can repeat them perfectly.

For hitting a police cruiser so hard he almost knocked the donut out of the officer mouth.

And for allegedly rear-ending a cop which interestingly is verboten on the streets of Green Bay and yet, oddly, encouraged backstage after Village People concerts.

We are proud to name Damien Kindt as this week’s Rick and Len Show...WEENIE OF THE WEEK!
posted by: Rick And Len at 2:44 pm Comment On This Post

jul 6th 2012


We are proud to name as this week’s Rick and Len Show Weenie of the Week…Brett Favre who apparently still not ready to let bygones be bygones. This week it was revealed that someone from the Packer Hall of Fame called Favre’s agent, Bus Cook, to invite him to return to Green Bay for the Hall’s induction ceremony honoring Mike Holmgren, the man who coached Brett to his only Super Bowl win. Favre reportedly did not respond to the invitation and is not expected to attend.

So,

For apparently still being too pissed to even reply to the invitation or evidently thinking R.S.V.P. stands for “Redneck Stay Vexed Perpetually”.

For again proving that while there is no “I” in team, there is one just to the left of center in “dick”.

And

For famously being indecisive about whether or not he wanted to be a player during the last years of his career but sticking firmly to his decision to be a douchebag in his retirement.

We are proud to name Brett Favre as this week’s Rick and Len Show Weenie of the Week.
posted by: Rick And Len at 11:25 am Comment On This Post

jul 5th 2012
June 17th City of Portage
A woman on Armstrong Street called police to report a theft of French fries. The woman told police she was walking from the Friendly Tavern with an order of fries when someone approached her and told her she either had to give him the fries or get into a truck. She told the officer she chose to give the man the fries.

June 14th Town of Harrison
A Firelane 9 resident called police to report someone put a homemade Scott Walker sign in their yard without their permission nine days after the recall election. The caller told police they have a suspect in mind.

June 22nd City of Waupun
Police responded to a report of parents lighting sparklers for their children on East Main Street. Police found no laws being broken.

June 11th Village of Sherwood
Police responded to a report of a large black umbrella lying in a ditch.

June 24th Village of Bowler
Police received a report of a porcupine named “Spike” gnawing on the foundation of the Education Center on the Stockbridge Munsee reservation. Shawano County Sheriff’s Deputies were told the porcupine would be difficult to capture because he is quite intelligent.

June 29th City of Mequon
An 82-year-old man was cited for disorderly conduct at a water park. The man became angry with a woman who was sitting on the edge of the pool with her legs in the water, saying she was blocking his swimming lane and cursed at her in both Russian and English.

June 23rd City of Beaver Dam
Police investigated a report that a man dropped off a live animal in a trap on Park Avenue. Police found the “live animal” in the trap was actually a bag of soda cans.

June 22nd City of Wauwatosa
A 48-year-old man was arrested for retail theft after allegedly stealing a package of breast pump bags and then returning them for a refund.

June 21st City of Wauwatosa
Police received a report of a man “wearing a full winter hat, two shirts and heavy green overcoat”. The man told the investigating officer he just always wears coats and he was wearing a hat because he HATES his hair!

June 16th City of Glendale
A 72-year-old Neshkoro man was arrested for disorderly conduct during a recital at Cardinal Stritch University. The woman sat in front of the man and while whispering to friends, he yelled at her to quit jumping around. When she whispered again to a friend, he smacked her on the back of the head.

June 20th City of Portage
Police investigated a report of the theft of $2 in cash from a Henry Drive home. A 29-year-old woman was cited for obstructing an officer after she allegedly lied to police during the investigation of the missing $2.00.

June 24th City of Portage
Police investigated a report of overly aggressive sales tactics by children selling Kool-Aid on West Franklin Street.

June 20th City of Wauwatosa
A 32-year-old man was arrested for vandalism after he spread honey across a desk, damaged a computer mouse pad and threw a Bible and religious brochures on a desk at Hall Automotive. A nail had been driven through the bible, the brochures and the mouse pad to bind them together. When apprehended and searched, the man was found to be carrying a backpack full of chicken bones.
posted by: Rick And Len at 10:32 am Comment On This Post