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may 20th


We are proud to name as this week’s Rick and Len Show Weenie of the Week…51-year-old Timothy Saling of Farmington Hills, Michigan who, Monday, was arrested at the American Club in Kohler. Police responded to a medical call at the American Club and made contact with a man, later identified as Saling, lying on the ground outside and screaming.

The officer smelled a strong odor of intoxicants on Saling's breath. When asked if had any injuries, Saling responded by barking and growling like a dog. When paramedics arrived on scene and offered to help Saling back to his room, as he could not walk on his own, he punched one of them several times in the ear and head. At that point, Saling, who was found to have a blood-alcohol level of .253, reportedly began growling and barking like a dog once again.

So,

For actions that have landed him in the doghouse, where, I’m assuming he’s going to feel right at home.

For behavior that makes you hope the Betty Ford Center has a kennel.

And for barking and growling at police…which, I’m guessing, they at least find preferable to him sniffing their crotches.

We are proud to name alleged drunken, barking, growling, head puncher Timothy Saling as this week’s Rick and Len Show…WEENIE OF THE WEEK!
posted by: Rick And Len at 11:49 am Comment On This Post

may 18th


TOP TEN REASONS WHY AREA RESIDENTS DRINK SO MUCH

10. State DOT program where you get one free drunk driving arrest for every 10 punches on your card, far more popular than anticipated.

9. We're just trying to emulate the current governor by drinking until we can’t see straight.

8. We're just trying to emulate a former governor by drinking until we can’t speak straight.

7. Without fees collected from drunk driving repeat offenders, we’ wouldn't be able to afford never ending construction on Highway 41.

6. Hey, you try watching the Milwaukee Brewers sober.

5. People would never be able to survive the WAPL International Incident without an intensive year-round training regimen.

4. Thirty years ago, Appleton built a bridge leading into the downtown, then built a mall in the middle of the street so you couldn’t get anywhere. You can only justify something like that by blaming it on generations of institutional alcoholism.

3. After eating a steady diet of deep fried cheese curds, without the benefit of blood thinning alcohol, the stuff in our veins would have the same consistency of a nice fondue.

2. I swear to god, there is a number 2, I'm just too damn drunk right now to remember it!

1. You can’t wash the bad taste out of your mouth that comes from losing the North Division to the Vikings with just milk or seltzer.
posted by: Rick And Len at 10:30 am Comment On This Post

may 16th

Photo is NOT the moped helmet wearer from story below.

May 7th City of Marshfield
A 78-year-old landlord came into the Police Department to a report a dispute with one of his tenants. The landlord alleged that, during an argument, the tenant flipped the top of landlord's moped helmet down and walked away. The tenant stated that he did not touch the 78-year-old landlord's moped helmet and that the helmet fell down on its own several times while the two were arguing.

May 9th City of Wisconsin Rapids
A resident called police to report that someone below his apartment was pushing his floor up. The caller also indicated that his upstairs neighbors were pushing his ceiling down.

May 11th City of Sheboygan
Police responded to a report of a man sitting outside of Wendy's, talking to himself and throwing water at passersby.

May 12th City of Marshfield
A man called police and reported his wife was throwing his items into the garbage contrary to a previous agreement made with officers that she would not throw away the man's things. The woman had reportedly thrown out her husband's nozzle.

May 14th City of Sheboygan
A vehicular chase on Kentucky Avenue ended with the driver throwing his hat over a fence.

May 6th Village of Pewaukee
A cleaning crew at the county technical college caught a student security officer in the act of eating two bags of potato chips and drinking a soda.

May 5th City of Delafield
A representative for an area company called police to report the theft of 600 pounds of used cooking oil.

April 25th City of Neenah
A caller reported a female walked out of the grocery store with a cart full of groceries she didn’t pay for. The woman then left the groceries sitting in the parking lot and got into a vehicle and left.

April 27th City of Neenah
The principal of a school called police and reported some sort of blue marker was used to write graffiti on different parts of the school. Based on the height of the graffiti, it is likely a fifth-grade student or younger and not gang related.

May 1st City of Neenah
A resident called police about a problem she was having with a robin's nest above her porch light. The birds are attacking her when she goes outside. She has requested assistance from the landlord and stated they are bird lovers so will not help her. An officer assisted in moving the robin’s nest to a nearby tree.

May 2nd City of Waukesha
A caller reported that the boy living in a neighboring apartment was yelling "I am going to kill you," and "I am going to stab you in the head." Police talked to the boy and he told them he was saying those things while playing a computer game with his on-line friend — not to anyone in the home. Police advised the boy to have more self-control.

May 7th City of Marshfield
A man told police that a woman threatened to have him incarcerated because he ate at Burger King instead of buying her son a new pair of shoes.
posted by: Rick And Len at 10:41 am Comment On This Post

may 13th


We are proud to name as this week’s Rick and Len Show Weenies of the Week… Cody Fyffe, Julian Cedron, Brema H. Brema all from Milwaukee and Lillian Fong from Lake Geneva, two of whom were sentenced this week with crimes relating to their alleged January break-in of the abandoned Sheboygan County Comprehensive Health Center where they were hunting for ghosts.

The four reportedly read on-line that the former asylum was haunted and reportedly decided to break in a see for themselves. The amateur ghost hunters allegedly spent about an hour in the empty building before being discovered by the caretaker.

So,

For breaking INTO an asylum when you’d assume people seemingly this crazy might be more inclined to be breaking OUT of an asylum.

For not knowing that you don’t break into an old asylum that’s overseen by a mysterious caretaker looking for ghosts unless you have a psychedelic colored van and are accompanied by talking Great Dane and his stoner sidekick.

For not realizing that you don't break into an asylum in Sheboygan County to look for ghosts. You break into an asylum in Sheboygan County....to get away from all the crazy people.

We are proud to name....



Julian Cedron



Cody Fyffe



Brema H. Brema


and Lilian Fong...

...who got caught after they allegedly broke into the old Sheboygan Asylum to look for ghosts as this week's Rick and Len....WEENIES OF THE WEEK!
posted by: Rick And Len at 10:39 am Comment On This Post

may 11th


It was initially reported this past weekend that there had been a "stabbing" near UW-O. After it was discovered that the weapon was a bottleopener, the report to changed to indicated it was a "jabbing". One can only assume the following types of attacks are pending in Oshkosh.


An Ab-bing…That’s where you’re accosted by a physically fit man who humiliates you by publically comparing his six-pack to your half barrel.

A Fab-bing…That’s where roving bands of rouge interior designers invade your home and using bright, vibrant colors and lively wall treatments make it fabulous against your will.

A Drabbing…The opposite of a fab-ing. It’s where a group of anti-interior designers invade your already lovely home, and inspired by the look of downtown Menasha in the eighties, make it as drab and lifeless as Jeb Bush’s enthusiasm-bereft presidential campaign.

A Flab-bing..That’s where a large, sweaty man accosts you and, against your will, forces your face into his moist, clammy back fat.

A Gab-bing…that’s where you are set upon by some hooligan who, instead of physically injuring you, instead puts you through the slow, mindless, painful torture of having Appleton Mayor Tim Hanna tell you a story.

A Tab-bing…that's where someone forces you to drink the popular 60’s and 70’s era diet soda, Tab, which isn’t really that bad, unless you don’t like a beverage that tastes like Coke that was used to wash an old man’s taint.
posted by: Rick And Len at 11:14 am Comment On This Post

may 11th

Inspired by Appleton Monthly's list, we came up with our own...

TOP TEN THINGS TO DO IN THE FOX VALLEY THIS SUMMER

10. Organize the 1st annual Kimberly Laxative Fest the weekend after 28th annual Little Chute Cheese Fest.

9. Go to the Bubolz Nature Preserve in Grand Chute. Hike the trails. Take a class. Or just try not to giggle every time you think about how much Bubolz sounds like "blue balls".

8. Bring Green Bay Mayor Jim Schmitt and a tiny saddle to the Greenville Catfish races. Tell everyone he’s a catfish jockey.

7. Visit Appleton's Paper Discovery Center where you can learn about the history of paper and annoy the proprietors by using their restroom and wiping with one of their exhibits.

6. Visit the Building for Kids in downtown Appleton. Try not to look too disappointed when they tell you don’t actually sell kids there, then flee before police arrive.

5. Visit Little Chute’s Windmill, the area’s only tourist attraction that both literally and figuratively blows.

4. Show an interest in local geology by examining the vast collection of rocks at the Weis Earth Science Museum at UW Fox or in Appleton Mayor Tim Hanna's head.

3. Drop by Mulberry Farm in Sherwood where “Milking a cow, catching a chicken, cuddling a kitten or kiss a pig” is all included in the admission. However, that thing you like to do with the sheep is going to cost you extra.

2. Attend Mile of Music and take a dump in Corey Chisel's hat.

1. Plan a full day with your wife or girlfriend were the two of you go to one of those places where you make and paint your own pottery…all while gamely struggling not to put the gun in your mouth.

posted by: Rick And Len at 10:59 am Comment On This Post

may 9th

(Actual Madison police officer holding the actual seized weapons)

May 2nd City of Madison
Police received a rash of calls from concerned citizens reporting a group of teen boys in a car shooting squirt guns at other vehicles. Officers quickly located the suspects who were armed with a pair of Super Soaker Tornado Scream water blasters that according to police, "unleash wide-stream soakage with a mighty stream of water up to 35 feet via a pressurized-trigger and spinning nozzle." Officers gave the boys a stern talking to and confiscated the Super Soaker Tornado Scream water blasters.

April 28th City of Oak Creek
An officer responded to Pick 'n Save after a man threatened to break a gumball machine. The man apparently became upset after he put 50 cents into the machine and it didn't dispense a gumball. The store reimbursed the man the 50 cents, and he again tried to put the change into the machine. Still no gumball. The man then threatened to break the machine, and told the employee to call police. When the officer arrived he put 50 cents into the machine and got three gumballs. The man was warned about his behavior and was told not to threaten to break any more gumball machines.

May 4th Village of Pewaukee
Police received a report of a 9-year-old girl dressed as a unicorn and knocking on the door of an ice cream shop. The girl's mother was nearby and told police her daughter likes dressing up in furry costumes and waving to people. She was not aware that such behavior would cause a problem that required police intervention.

May 3rd Community of Deerbrook
Officers responded to a call from a man reporting he just returned home and found a note on his door reading "return my minnow trap or else I will make your life hell". The caller told police he has no idea what this was about or who left the note.

April 28th Village of Jackson
An employee of a local business told police that they received more than a dozen, profanity-laced telephone calls from a 49-year-old man with whom they are familiar. The man would make his remark, usually incorporating the f-word, then hang up. An officer warned the man that he’d be arrested if the calls continued. The man immediately called the business again and delivered a hearty “F*** you”. When police confronted the man about the final call, he claimed it must have been a “pocket dial".



May 1st Dane County
A Stoughton man contacted police to report finding what he described as a "big box of human blood" in the middle of the road. Police determined that the box, clearly marked "human blood" belonged to the American Red Cross. A Red Cross lab technician told officers they were expecting a delivery of six boxes of blood from a satellite office, but only received five. They believe the volunteer who was transporting it, accidentally left one box of blood on the hood or roof of their car before driving off. Since the box was not damaged, the blood was still good to go.

April 30th Village of Jackson
Two officers and the sheriff's deputy were dispatched to break up a fight at the Jackson Pub. The deejay reported that he’d been paid to work until 11:00 PM but when he started to pack up, two patrons, ages 50 and 60, demanded that he keep playing music and work for free. Their demands became insistent and loud, at which time the deejay called for police protection.

April 29th Village of Jackson
The principal of the elementary school told police two of his students reported being chased by a 10-year-old with an axe.

April 29th Village of Jackson
An officer stopped an 82-year-old man on Highway 45 after he failed to dim his high beams as numerous vehicles overtook and passed him. The officer asked the man about the odor of intoxicants inside the car and the man said he was returning from a gathering of his German singing group and had had just one beer to keep his vocal cords loose. The elderly gentleman blew a .02 on the Breathalyzer apparently proving his claim that he only had enough to warm his vocal chords for his German singing group.

May 1st City of Marshfield
A man called police and reported he found a woman he didn't know in his residence. He said the woman ran out a patio door when he saw her, and he chased her until she got into a van. Officers determined the incident didn't happen and issued the man a citation for obstructing an officer.

May 3rd City of Green Bay
Officers responded to a residence on 5th Street where a child playing with toy handcuffs got stuck to a drain pipe. May 5th City of Sheboygan Police were called to Kohl's Department Store where a fired employee... keeps showing up for work.

April 27th City of Waukesha
An 18-year-old man shoved a screw through his wrist with his own hand. According to the police report, the man was upset following an argument with his mother and forced the screw through his wrist to "relieve stress."

April 28th City of Wauwatosa
A 45-year-old man who was found passed out in a grassy area was taken into custody after police asked him for identification and he handed them a marijuana pipe.

May 2nd City of Delafield
Police spotted but were unable to round up a number of male teenagers who were running around in various states of undress and shooting each other with Nerf and water guns. According to the police report, the teens ran into a house when they spotted police and refused to answer the door when an officer knocked.

May 2nd Village of Pewaukee
At 10:57am, a village police officer reported assisting a baby duck crossing the street. According to the police report, the officer "wasn't sure where the duckling wanted to go," but made sure the duckling made it safely from the railroad tracks there across a busy street. The mother duck wasn't immediately found.

May 2nd Village of Pewaukee
Police were dispatched to remove a bicycle hung from the swing set at a local park. The owner of the bike told officers he had left the bicycle at the park overnight, and suspected some "big kids" put it on the swing set. No suspects have been identified.

May 6th City of Sheboygan
Police confronted a man on the 8th Street bridge who allegedly peed and pooped in the river.

April 28th City of Waukesha
A resident asked police to be more proactive against "Muslims" and "Indians" because he was concerned some personal information he used in an online job search was going to be used against him by "terrorists." The man said his accounts had not been hacked, but demanded action by police anyway.

May 2nd City of Wisconsin Rapids
A boy told police some kids knocked on his door, he opened it, and they barged in, took his scooter and shoved it in a mud hole.

April 30th City of Beaver Dam
Police received a report of a man in a dress standing in a bush.

May 1st City of Wisconsin Rapids
A citizen called police to report finding a live hamster inside a cage inside a dumpster. Police determined that the owner of the hamster in the cage accidentally left it in the dumpster and now was in route to pick it up.

posted by: Rick And Len at 10:51 am Comment On This Post

may 6th


We are proud to name as this week’s Rick and Len Show Weenie of the Week…68-year-old Richard Zeier of New Richmond who is accused of drinking a child’s urine, apparently as a means of achieving some type of sexual gratification. According to police, Zeier, who calls himself “a receptacle”, had a boy, under the age of 10, urinate directly into his mouth three separate times. Zeire reportedly told investigators that “over the years I've gotten a taste for it". Officers say they also found several bottles near his refrigerator containing an amber-colored liquid. Zeire confirmed that the bottles were filled with “pee”.

(He apparently likes it both in bottles and on tap!)

So, For not realizing that human urine is not meant to be drunk…it’s meant to be sprayed on the streets of Fond du Lac when you are drunk.

For apparently misunderstanding a show on the Food Network that claimed, "leeks are delicious".

And for proving the hard way that there actually is something that can leave a worse taste in your mouth than this year’s presidential election.

We are proud to name Richard Zeier of New Richmond, as this week's Rick and Len Show...Weenie of the Week!

posted by: Rick And Len at 10:26 am Comment On This Post

may 4th



WHAT TED CRUZ IS GOING TO DO NOW

10. Is going to start a new website called Punchable Face…book.

9. Will spend several weeks in a deep funk unable to get out of bed giving a new meaning to the name “Lyin’ Ted”.

8. Plans to spend more time with his family…and elbowing them in the face.

7. Will just kick back and relax with a couple of Molson’s like any good Canadian.

6. Will admit that he really is the Zodiac Killer, the lead singer of Stryper, Kevin from The Office and also Becky with the good hair.

5. Will have his running mate Carly Fiorina do what she does best…and let her fire his campaign staff.

4. Is going to get together with some buddies and a basketball to shoot some “rings”.

3. Going back to tucking his daughters in at night, giving them their good night kisses and watching them flinch.

2. He's going to Disneyland...oh, wait that's just for winners.

1. Will decide if he should license the new name John Boehner gave him last week, "Lucifer in the Flesh", to be used by a Rock Band, Race Horse or Porn Film.
posted by: Rick And Len at 10:24 am Comment On This Post

may 2nd


April 24th City of Franklin
A 68-year-old woman was cited for disorderly conduct after she allegedly threw and kicked items around her neighbor's lot line. As evidence, the caller gave police a video that showed the woman kicking at the rocks on the lot line and yelling, "Go blow yourselves."

April 25th City of Green Bay
Police were called to the Walgreens on East Mason to deal with a man who was disorderly and punching the walls. The man said he is angry that he did not get the Western Union money transfer he was expecting and needs that money to buy a dime bag.

April 18th City of Green Bay
An emergency rescue crew was dispatched to aid a man with a fishing lure stuck in his finger. The man had passed out but regained consciousness by the time the rescue crew arrived.

April 18th City of Greenfield
Police responded to a report of an intoxicate man crawling on all fours in the southbound lane of traffic on a busy street. Police took the man to his home and turned him over to relatives.

April 24th City of Greenfield Officers were called to the scene after a resident reported a suspicious man was pushing an ice cream cart through the neighborhood. When police asked the caller why he thought the ice cream vendor was "suspicious," he said because he thought it wasn't warm enough to be selling ice cream.

April 13th City of Menasha
An officer responded to a complaint of loud music coming from a van on Elm Street. Police could hear the music from several houses away. A man in the driver's seat was intoxicated and said he was outside playing music because his wife gets mad when he plays it inside the house.

April 19th City of Oak Creek
Police were called to a movie theater where a woman who was angry that another woman was sitting in her seat, dumped a full bucket of popcorn on the seated woman's head.

April 21st City of Oak Creek
An elderly woman called 911 to report she was being followed by a car and did not feel safe. The dispatcher informed the woman that the car that had been following her for 5 miles was a police cruiser with its lights and siren on. The officer was following her so he could cite her for lane deviations, driving without headlamps at night, and now, failure to yield for an emergency vehicle.

April 26th City of Sheboygan
Police responded to a report of a raccoon chasing a construction worker.

April 23rd Village of Pewaukee
A suspicious man sitting in a parked car in a municipal parking lot at 1:20 AM was reported to police. When officers arrived, they found the man in the driver seat with a laptop computer open. The man told police he was working on a book about physics and found it easier to write in the car than he did in his house.

April 26th Village of Pewaukee
The manager of the Costco called police to report that despite repeated warnings, a delivery driver keeps pooping behind the store. The manager indicated that he was going to warn the delivery company one more time about the problem before asking for a citation to be issued.

April 26th City of Beaver Dam
A man called police to report his neighbors' 11-year-old son used profanity and shot Nerf darts at his car.
posted by: Rick And Len at 10:55 am Comment On This Post

apr 29th


We are proud to as this week's Rick and Len Show Weenie of the Week... Jeremy Loveland of St. Francis. Loveland called 911 for assistance Tuesday after he was bitten by a poisonous water moccasin in his suburban Milwaukee home. When police arrived, they found, in addition to the deadly water moccasin, another snake, a monitor lizard and two four-foot alligators all living in the man's home. All the reptiles were seized.

Five years ago this month, Loveland also called 911 for assistance after he was bitten in his home by a deadly Gaboon Viper. At that time, authorities found and removed 36 reptiles from his home, including eight western diamond back rattlesnakes, a temple viper, two crocodiles and 3 cobras.

So,

For learning so well from his previous mistake...he was able to repeat it almost exactly.

For housing so many foul, disgusting creatures his home could have been mistaken for the halls of congress.

For having large reptiles seized from his home so many times, the phrases "see you later, alligator" and "in a while crocodile" bring a tear to his eye.

We are proud to name Jeremy Loveland of St. Francis as this week’s Rick and Len Show…Weenie of the Week!
posted by: Rick And Len at 10:23 am Comment On This Post

apr 28th


TOP TEN NAMES FOR THE NEUROSCIENCE GROUP MASCOT THAT LOOKS MORE LIKE BALLS THAN BRAINS

10. Tommy Tea Bag

9. Peter Plums

8. Testy, My Besty

7. Lance Love Apples

6. Gilbert Giggle-Berries

5. Yacob Yambag

4. Chad Nads

3. Scrotty

2. Howie Hangin’

1. Sack-ajawea

posted by: Rick And Len at 10:08 am Comment On This Post

apr 27th



Erect giant car catapult or car trebuchet at the north end of the Skyline Bridge.

Build giant ramps and encourage drivers get a running start to Evel Knevel themselves over that architectural folly.

Encourage geneticists to work with paleontologists to use Jurassic-era DNA to clone extinct beasts and then have cars flown over the mall by resurrected pterodactyls.

Imprison Mexican drug lord El Chapo in nearby transit center and after he digs a tunnel under the City Center to get out follow him in motor vehicles.

Borrow the giant cannon from Green Bay City Council that alderman Guy Zima uses to regularly shoot his mouth off and use it to blast commuters over or through the City Center.

Pray to the late former Appleton Mayor Dorothy Johnson to have her arrange to have all vehicular traffic ferried over the building on the backs of a throng of winged angels.
posted by: Rick And Len at 11:37 am Comment On This Post

apr 25th

(Not the actual Sheboygan County "Free Candy" van.

April 20th Sheboygan County
A caller reported that an unknown person spray painted the words "free candy" on the side of their van.

April 9th City of Waukesha
A woman called police to report that a neighbor man was giving sausages to her dog. The man told police he was giving the dog sausages to try to get it to stop barking. Police advised the neighbor to stop slipping the dog the sausages.

April 6th City of Menominee Falls
A man walked into the wine area at Costco and shoved a bottle of Dom Perignon champagne down his trousers. The man then had conversations with several employees before leaving with $200 worth of champagne in this pants.

April 12th City of Antigo
A man called police to report a woman curled up in a ball in a bush in his front yard. When police arrived, the woman was still curled up in a ball but now in the middle of the highway in front of the home. The curled-up woman told police she was just looking for her dog.

April 23rd Village of Howards Grove
Police responded to a report of two drunk men who pulled up in a vehicle, urinated in front of a group of women, and then drove away.

April 23rd City of Sheboygan
A caller on Larkspur Way complained to the police that when they yelled at some kids to get off their lawn the kids did not get off their lawn.
posted by: Rick And Len at 10:31 am Comment On This Post

apr 22nd



We are proud to name as this week’s Rick and Len Show Weenie of the Week… 52-year-old Alan Burby of Sheboygan who was arrested after allegedly taking a moped while intoxicated and crashing it into several parked cars. Burby then knocked on the door of a nearby home and asked the occupant to see "Jesus" but then reportedly became agitated when the woman told him Jesus was not home. Burby was arrested and charged with his fifth DUI.

So, For stealing and crashing a moped; an act that couldn't be LESS bad ass if he'd done it while wearing a Kenny G t-shirt and sipping a strawberry Frappuccino.

For damaging more cars with a moped than Gravedigger at the Monster Truck XL.

And for looking for Jesus in Sheboygan. Yeah, Sheboygan. I know, some people will tell you Jesus is everywhere…but come on, he’s got to have some standards.

We are proud to name Alan D. Burby of Sheboygan as this week's Rick and Len Show...WEENIE OF THE WEEK!
posted by: Rick And Len at 10:23 am Comment On This Post

apr 18th


April 4th Village of Jackson
Police responded to the scene of a domestic disturbance. The disturbance started when a 24-year-old woman told her boyfriend that he didn’t treat her right and he threw a jewelry box at her, striking her in the stomach. The woman allegedly responded by punching a hole in the wall, dumping the cat food out on the floor and knocking over her boyfriend's Legos.

April 4th City of Neenah
A Union Street resident called police to report they have suspicions that their neighbor may have a pet turkey. April 9th City of Sheboygan A man on North 35th Street called police to request assistance because he was extremely constipated.

April 17th City of Green Bay
Police responded to a report of a woman in church pulling her hair.

April 4th City of Neenah An East Bell Street resident called police needing to speak with an officer. The man arranged to meet the officer at a restaurant. Upon arrival. the officer found there were no problems, the caller just wanted someone to talk to.

April 13th City of Horicon
A man who was taking a shower when he realized his garage was on fire, ran from his house wearing only a towel around his waist and into the burning garage to save his motorcycle. The man lost the towel while saving his motorcycle. A passerby stopped and helped the now naked man contain the blaze with the garden hose until firefighters arrived to extinguish it. At that time, the naked man returned to his shower.

April 3rd City of Waukesha
A caller reported while he was pumping gas into his vehicle at a convenience store when a man who seemed intoxicated drove up next to him and urinated all over his car.

April 11th City of Sheboygan
Police were called to 14th Street and Weeden Creek Road where numerous people chasing a small pig.

April 3rd City of Waukesha
A landlord of an apartment called police because he believed a tenant was damaging the inside of the apartment. The landlord told officers he saw the tenant picking up sticks in the front yard and taking them inside. Upon investigation, the officers learned the tenant was just using the sticks to make a centerpiece.

April 6th City of Waukesha
A caller reported a noise complaint concerning the unit above her apartment at 4:07.am. Police determined the loud stomping came from a man and woman dancing to the video game "Just Dance" and jumping on the dance pad. The couple was cautioned by police and about early morning dancing.

April 14th City of Appleton
Police received a report of a 19-year-old woman at the intersection of Taft and Tellulah who injured her head and ankle when she fell off a moving vehicle while car surfing.

April 3rd City of Cudahy
Police cited a 38-year-old man for battery after he allegedly ran over another man's foot with his wheelchair because he was jealous that the man was talking to a female friend.

March 26th City of Greenfield
A woman called 911 at 11:40 PM to report her 38-year-old son was going to bed too late.

March 24th City of Greenfield
Police responded to a Citgo station after multiple callers reported a man was causing a disturbance by singing and dancing around inside the business. Officers spoke to the man, who stated he was happy and singing because he had just been released from the Waukesha County Jail.

April 9th City of Oak Creek
Police responded to an apartment after a caller reported hearing a physical altercation and a child screaming for help. An officer spoke to the resident and learned that the screaming was coming from the occupant's two children who were fighting over who got to use the iPad.

April 15th Village of Biron
The sheriff's department responded to a report of a Porta-Potty floating down the Wisconsin River.

April 13th City of Wisconsin Rapids
An employee at Kwik Trip called police to report a woman sitting in a white truck “cursing at the air.”

April 2nd City of Antigo
Officers responded to a call from a female subject reporting that when she went to her parent’s house, who are out of town, to check on a package delivery, she found the house had been broken into and ransacked. After the officers' arrival, it was determined that no burglary had occurred and that the home had been ransacked by a squirrel.
posted by: Rick And Len at 10:26 am Comment On This Post

apr 18th


April 4th Village of Jackson
Police responded to the scene of a domestic disturbance. The disturbance started when a 24-year-old woman told her boyfriend that he didn’t treat her right and he threw a jewelry box at her, striking her in the stomach. The woman allegedly responded by punching a hole in the wall, dumping the cat food out on the floor and knocking over her boyfriend's Legos.

April 4th City of Neenah
A Union Street resident called police to report they have suspicions that their neighbor may have a pet turkey. April 9th City of Sheboygan A man on North 35th Street called police to request assistance because he was extremely constipated.

April 17th City of Green Bay
Police responded to a report of a woman in church pulling her hair.

April 4th City of Neenah An East Bell Street resident called police needing to speak with an officer. The man arranged to meet the officer at a restaurant. Upon arrival. the officer found there were no problems, the caller just wanted someone to talk to.

April 13th City of Horicon
A man who was taking a shower when he realized his garage was on fire, ran from his house wearing only a towel around his waist and into the burning garage to save his motorcycle. The man lost the towel while saving his motorcycle. A passerby stopped and helped the now naked man contain the blaze with the garden hose until firefighters arrived to extinguish it. At that time, the naked man returned to his shower.

April 3rd City of Waukesha
A caller reported while he was pumping gas into his vehicle at a convenience store when a man who seemed intoxicated drove up next to him and urinated all over his car.

April 11th City of Sheboygan
Police were called to 14th Street and Weeden Creek Road where numerous people chasing a small pig.

April 3rd City of Waukesha
A landlord of an apartment called police because he believed a tenant was damaging the inside of the apartment. The landlord told officers he saw the tenant picking up sticks in the front yard and taking them inside. Upon investigation, the officers learned the tenant was just using the sticks to make a centerpiece.

April 6th City of Waukesha
A caller reported a noise complaint concerning the unit above her apartment at 4:07.am. Police determined the loud stomping came from a man and woman dancing to the video game "Just Dance" and jumping on the dance pad. The couple was cautioned by police and about early morning dancing.

April 14th City of Appleton
Police received a report of a 19-year-old woman at the intersection of Taft and Tellulah who injured her head and ankle when she fell off a moving vehicle while car surfing.

April 3rd City of Cudahy
Police cited a 38-year-old man for battery after he allegedly ran over another man's foot with his wheelchair because he was jealous that the man was talking to a female friend.

March 26th City of Greenfield
A woman called 911 at 11:40 PM to report her 38-year-old son was going to bed too late.

March 24th City of Greenfield
Police responded to a Citgo station after multiple callers reported a man was causing a disturbance by singing and dancing around inside the business. Officers spoke to the man, who stated he was happy and singing because he had just been released from the Waukesha County Jail.

April 9th City of Oak Creek
Police responded to an apartment after a caller reported hearing a physical altercation and a child screaming for help. An officer spoke to the resident and learned that the screaming was coming from the occupant's two children who were fighting over who got to use the iPad.

April 15th Village of Biron
The sheriff's department responded to a report of a Porta-Potty floating down the Wisconsin River.

April 13th City of Wisconsin Rapids
An employee at Kwik Trip called police to report a woman sitting in a white truck “cursing at the air.”

April 2nd City of Antigo
Officers responded to a call from a female subject reporting that when she went to her parent’s house, who are out of town, to check on a package delivery, she found the house had been broken into and ransacked. After the officers' arrival, it was determined that no burglary had occurred and that the home had been ransacked by a squirrel.
posted by: Rick And Len at 10:25 am Comment On This Post

apr 15th


We are proud to name as this week’s Rick and Len Show Weenie of the Week…the Milwaukee Brewer fan who made headlines by licking someone else's vomit off the stands at Miller Park last weekend in exchange for $100.

So,

For doing the most gut-wrenching thing a person could possibly do at Miller Park, shy of watching the Brewers lose another game to the frickin’ Cardinals.

For making Brewer fans the most nauseated they’ve been since the 2013 revelation about Ryan Braun’s steroid use.

And for giving a black eye to Brewer fans, the likes of which has not been seen since the time Front Row Amy went running without a bra.

We are proud to name the Brewer fan who…oh, don’t make me say what he did again…as this week’s Rick and Len Show…WEENIE OF THE WEEK!
posted by: Rick And Len at 10:16 am Comment On This Post

apr 13th


A guy in Minnesota was busted on Friday for doing 171 miles-per-hour in a 2016 Chevy Camaro. A police officer had to get HIS car up to 135 just to get close enough for the guy to see his flashing lights and pull over. The incident is expected to:
a. cost the driver his license.
b. lead to stiffer speeding penalties.
c. sell an ass load of 2016 Chevy Camaros.

CBS and Turner TV just inked a deal with the NCAA for 8.8 billion dollars to keep March Madness coverage on their networks through the year 2032. Most of that money will go to:
a. introducing new technology to game coverage.
b. funding scholarships for student athletes.
c. keeping Vern Lundquist in cryogenic suspension for 11 months of the year.

Speaker of the House Paul Ryan made it absolutely clear yesterday that he has no interest whatsoever in being president and under no circumstances would he accept the nomination if offered it at a brokered convention. Ryan made the speech while:
a. addressing reporters in the capitol rotunda.
b. speaking in the house chamber.
c. picking out new carpet for the oval office.

A 25-year-old Brooklyn man set the world record for the longest TV binge-watching session this past week, sitting in front of the tube for 94 straight hours. If you can watch TV that long without falling asleep, it proves:
a. TV is more stimulating that previously thought.
b. the human body is capable of remarkable feats of endurance.
c. you are not watching the NBC 26 news.

Kobe Bryant retires tonight.Amazingly, in Kobe's 20 years in the NBA:
a. he scored over 30,000 points.
b. he played in 18 All Star games.
c. he never nailed a Kardashian.

Lindsey Lohan got engaged to a Russian millionaire this weekend. The ring he gave her was:
a. a 3 and a half karat diamond.
b. in a platinum setting.
c. the largest rock she's ever seen that wasn't crack.
posted by: Rick And Len at 10:44 am Comment On This Post

apr 12th


Yesterday Governor Walker encouraged people to buy his leftover Walker for President t-shirts for just $45 each to help him pay off his campaign debt. He suggested doing something "crafty" with them. Here's the...



TOP TEN THINGS TO DO WITH THE LEFTOVER WALKER FOR PRESIDENT SHIRTS

10. Dye them blaze orange so you have something to wear for hunting or weddings.

9. Add the word “white” before Walker and sell them to gullible Game of Thrones fans.

8. Add the words “Texas Ranger” after Walker and sell them to gullible Chuck Norris fans.

7. Burn them to fire bricks that can be used to start building his wall on the Canadian border.

6. Change the “L” in his name to an “N” so it looks like you support any of the candidates.

5. Cut them into strips and eat them. Find they are easier to pass than pro-teacher legislation in this state.

4. Use them to wipe your ass since they’re just about as biodegradable as the so called flushable wipes you’ve been using.

3. Use them to dab Rogaine on the governor's growing bald spot, excuse me, cabinet injury.

2. Stuff them in the mouth of jerky no-talent morning radio guys who make fun of his wonky eye.

1. Do what losing Super Bowl teams have done for years. Send them to third world countries like Kenya where some kid who gets one will do what the Governor couldn’t and become President of the United States one day.
posted by: Rick And Len at 10:32 am Comment On This Post