Calumet County District Attorney Ken "The Prize" Kratz has said he will not resign. Instead, he's taking some "medical leave". Since when has being a creepy a-hole been considered a medical condition? If that was the case, I'd be in intensive care!
Apparently, the medical condition must be his blindness that prevents him from seeing that what he did was wrong! To help, "The Prize" we've assembled these easy to recognize signs that...
IT MIGHT BE TIME TO RESIGN
If you're less popular than Ted Nugent at a PETA meeting...it might be time to resign.
If Mel Gibson has a better chance of becoming a sensitivity trainer than you have of getting re-elected...it might be time to resign.
If your presence is less appreciated than mine at an orgy...it might be time to resign.
If you have less support than Barrack Obama at a Klan rally...it might be time to resign.
If you'd have had to done what Bill Clinton did to leave a worst taste in people's mouths...it might be time to resign.
If the folks at Massengill concede that even with over 70 years of experience behind them, they've still never seen a bigger douchebag...it's definitely time to resign!!!!!!!
August 31st City of Menasha A patrol officer on First and Racine streets observed a man urinating on the sidewalk. The man was very intoxicated and initially denied it. After the officer pointed out to the man that he had also urinated on himself, he apologized.
September 8th City of Beaver Dam Police were called to the Shell Travel Mart where an alert clerk caught a perpetrator in the act of absconding with a Tootsie Roll.
September 7th Village of Pulaski A Nightingale Drive resident reported to police that someone pooped in her mailbox.
September 7th City of Portage Police received a report of the theft of a flag with a picture of a big yellow smiley face.
September 13th City of Whitefish Bay Police responded to a 911 call on North Hollywood. The resident told responding officers there was no emergency and that her 15-year-old daughter "dials and texts in her sleep."
September 10th City of Wisconsin Rapids A caller reported to police that her father brought a pickup load of her belongings to school and just left them.
Members of the Fox Cityz Foxz will be suited up in their roller derby outfits and selling tickets for the Jonah Hinds raffle at Gander Mountain in both Appleton and Sheboygan tomorrow (Saturday) morning at 10!
Buy some tix from hot chicks, help a great kid and win cool stuff like an Aaron Rodger's autographed jersey, Ted Nugent signed boar skull, an Amazon Kindle or any of the other great prizes.
For a complete list of prizes (and to learn more about Jonah or buy tickets on-line) click the Help Twitchy Raffle icon on the right!
Tickets are just $10 each, six for $50 or 13 for $100. Thanks for your support and good luck!
We are proud to name as this week's Rick and Len Show Weenie of the Week...Calumet County District Attorney Ken "The Prize" Kratz who, over the course of three days, sent 30 text messages of a domestic abuse victim whose assailant Kratz was supposed to be prosecuting. Among the messages were gems like...
"Are u the kind of girl that likes secret contact with an older married elected DA...the riskier the better?"
"Hey...Miss Communication, what's with the sticking point? Your low self-esteem and you fear you can't successfully play in my big sandbox?"
"I'm the attorney. I have the $350,000 house. I have the 6-figure career. You may be the tall, young, hot nymph, but I am the prize!"
For sending text messages that are almost as creepy as his 70's gay porno mustache.
For claiming to be "the prize", when, as far as I know, no woman has ever considered a man who looks like the mutant offspring of Chris Farley and Joseph Stalin a "prize".
For not realizing that "prizes" like him don’t come in a Cracker Jack box...they come in a tissue.
And for causing a world wide "w" shortage by creating texts for which the only suitable response is ..."Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww"!
We are proud to name Calumet County D.A. Ken Kratz as this week's Rick and Len Show...WEENIE OF THE WEEK!
Have you read the creepy test messages Calumet County District Attorney Ken Kratz sent to a domestic abuse victim whose assailant he was supposed to be prosecuting? He texted things like Are u the kind of girl that likes secret contact with an older married elected DA...the riskier the better?" and "Im the atty. I have the $350,000 house. I have the 6-figure career. You may have the tall, young, hot nymph, but I am the prize!"
How creepy are D.A. Ken Kratz test messages? Allow us to try to put them in perspective.
JUST HOW CREEPY ARE KEN KRATZ'S TEXT MESSAGES?
Creepier than an adult wearing toy X-Ray Specs but not quite as creepy as an adult wearing toy X-Ray Specs to a playground.
Creepier than a clown winking at you but not quite as creepy as a clown winking at you while he pees at the urinal right next to you.
Creepier than seeing a herpe on the lip of a mall Santa but quite not as creepy as seeing a herpe anywhere else on a mall Santa.
Creepier than a kiss from an elderly aunt who slips you the tongue but not quite as creepy as a kiss from an elderly aunt who slips you the tongue...and her dentures.
Creepier than a hug from Dick Cheney but not quite as creepy as a hug from Dick Cheney and a reach around from Donald Rumsfeld.
Creepier than watching porn with your grandfather but not quite as creepy as watching porn staring your grandfather.
Creepier than an ice cream truck that plays "I Touch Myself" by the Divinyls but not quite as creepy as an ice cream truck that plays "I Touch Myself" by the Divinyls being driven by a guy with a noticeably erect third nipple.
Fresh off of being named "Best in Fest" at North America's biggest comedy festival, Collin Moultin returns to Appleton's Skyline Comedy Cafe and that means he also returns to the Rick and Len Show Friday morning at 8. Why? Because comics love to get up early!
You can hear Collin on the air with us Friday morning about 8am and see him at the Skyline Comedy Cafe through Saturday. In fact, tonight is WAPL night. Mention that when you make your reservations at 920-734-JOKE(5653) and they'll give you 2 for 1 admission. It's the law!
Fifty of the nation's wealthiest people recently had their annual rich bastard's meeting. At least 10 billionaires (with a "B"!) were in attendance at this year's Blackstone Group meeting. According to to reports, the mood was downbeat, even gloomy. Yes, the recession has taken it's toll on America's billionaires, poor things.
Hey, turn that frown upside down, Mr. (or Ms.) Money Bags! And let us take a look at the top ten...
REASONS BILLIONAIRES ARE DEPRESSED
10. Surgeon General has warned that the cigars they've been lighting with hundred dollar bills could be hazardous to their health.
9. They've developed painful blisters on fingertips from repeatedly tapping them together while mumbling, "excellent".
8. They learned that Obama-care fails to provide medical coverage for injuries sustained while rolling around on beds covered with large piles of dirty, sexy money.
7. They've been spending too much time in their gloomy ass bat cave with their sad bastard manservant Alfred.
6. Due to meddling by the Food and Drug Administration, they can no longer legally buy Baby Gold Bond Powder made from real gold...and real babies.
5. They're sure if the seemingly never ending supply of bosomy blonds with asses you could bounce quarters off lining up for an opportunity to bang them like a cheap screen door are just interested in them for their money.
4. They hate the dirty looks they get for taking up 5 spaces with their stretch limo in the Wal-Mart parking lot.
3. Billions inherited from family's famed hotel empire can't change the fact that their daughter's a coke addled whore. (Richard Hilton only)
2. Due to rising inflation, cost of having a business rival tortured and killed 4.3% higher than at this time last year.
1. They were informed that Lamborghini is still no closer to producing a high performance car that runs on an enriched mixture of beluga caviar, Cristal champagne and the crushed dreams of the working poor.
You may have heard us play the song "Donald Driver" by the band Dos Guyz on the Rick and Len Show...and now you can buy it!
"Donald Driver" is a fantastic ode to the Pack's #80 put the the tune of Dio's "Holy Diver." It's the brainchild of a former Wisconsin resident and die-hard Packer fan who now lives and rocks in Seattle. Click here to hear it or buy it for yourself.
Jonah Hinds (for whom we're hosting a benefit raffle) will be featured tonight on a Discovery Health Channel special tonight at 8pm with repeats at 10pm and throughout the week. Find out more about this sensational kid from Van Dyne and his remarkable struggle by checking it out. Here's a clip of Jonah from the show
And make sure you buy some tickets for the benefit raffle by clicking the donate button below. You could win a Ted Nugent autographed boar's skull, an Aaron Rodger's autographed jersey, an Amazon Kindle, cool electronic gizmos, retail gift cards, prize baskets and more. The prize list is growing daily.
Buy your tickets easily and securely through PayPal by simply clicking on the DONATE button below.Your donation amount will determine how many raffle ticket numbers we will assign. Your numbers will be sent to you via the email address you use when you donate.
Tickets are just $10 each, six for $50 or 13 for $100. Thanks for your support and good luck!
According to Jordy Nelson, while the Packers were on their way to the stadium Sunday, Philly fans used sling-shots to pelt their bus with eggs. By the time they reached Lincoln Financial Field the bus was: a. severely damaged. b. beyond recognition. c. covered in more gooey protein than Ricky Martin at an Elton John pool party.
The reason Philly fans used eggs to pelt the bus was: a. to show they thought the Packers were a yolk. b. an attempt to beat the team by boosting their cholesterol. c. they were all out of batteries.
During Sunday's Packer game, Justin Harrell suffered what appeared to be a season ending knee injury. Harrell suffering a serious injury is: a. a massive blow to the Packer defense. b. a set back for Harrell’s career. c. as predicable as an episode of Walker: Texas Ranger.
At last night's MTV Video Music Awards, Kanye West performed a song toasting a-holes, scumbags and douchebags. The song is expected to be: a. controversial. b. a hit. c. the new theme for British Petroleum.
At the Video Music Awards's, pop star Lady Gaga wore a dress made entirely of raw meat. The meat dress was designed to: a. attract attention. b. annoy PETA. c. keep the flies off Lindsey Lohan.
After wearing the dress of raw meat, Lady Gaga is expected to change her name to: a. Lady RawRaw b. Lady Tartar c. Mrs. Guy Zima
Tourism officials in Mexico City are starting a campaign to attract gay honeymooners. This move will make the Mexican capital the perfect place to go if you’re looking for: a. an open minded vacation spot. b. fabulous parties. c. steamy Juan on Juan action.
September 5th City of Marshfield A 48-year-old employee witnessed two males acting suspiciously at the Central Wisconsin State Fair. Police found one of the men in possession of two five-pound bags of cheese curds and a pack of English muffins. The items were valued at $164.
September 18th City of Oshkosh An 18-year-old girl notified police that a man claiming to be an FBI agent tried to get her to go with him. According to the woman, she first encountered the man while she was walking home from Opera House Square and she noticed him screaming at a light post.
September 9th City of Shawano Police were called to a residence where they cited a man for public intoxication after he reportedly peed on a couch.
September 6th Village of Footville (Rock County) Police arrested a firefighter they say made 4 phony 911 calls reporting of gas odors with his fire district. The firefighter admitted to police that he made the false reports because he just wanted to go out on calls.
September 8th City of Shawano Police were called to aid in the search for a missing 10-year-old boy. The boy was eventually found...hiding in the bathroom.
September 4th City of Wisconsin Rapids A man on Chase Street called police to report someone unplugged his refrigerator and dismantled his clock.
August 14th City of New London Police received a call from a woman on West Cameron Street whose estranged husband kicked open her door and threw her phone across the room. The man also reportedly threw a loaf of bread.
August 14th City of De Pere Police responded to a call from someone on Main Street where a man was seen stomping on flower plants, pulling them up and then throwing them in the air. Alcohol was believed to be a factor.
We've added an autographed Aaron Rodgers Packer Jersey to the list of prizes including the Nugent signed boar head and lots of others for the Benefit for Jonah Hinds Raffle. Scroll down a bit for more prizes and information about Jonah and his medical condition! (watch the video...seriously!)
Buy your tickets easily and securely through PayPal by simply clicking on the DONATE button below.
Your donation amount will determine how many raffle ticket numbers we will assign.
Tickets are just $10 each, six for $50 or 13 for $100.
Your numbers will be sent to you via the email address you use when you donate.
The prize drawing will be held October 15, 2010 and winning numbers will be posted on this website.
We are proud to name as this week's Rick and Len Show Weenie of the Week...the exasperated, harrumphing jogger of the Farmer’s Market. If you missed the story earlier in the week, while attending this past Saturday's Farmer's Market in Appleton, I encountered a woman in her little jogging outfit and ear buds who was growing more and more irritated that people kept inadvertently stepping in front of her while she was trying to jog through the middle of a crowd of a few thousand people. Every few steps, the woman would have to zig around one person only to have to zag around the next. Each time shaking her head in disbelief at their rudeness for strolling down College Avenue at a casual pace and examining the Farmer's Market merchandise while she was trying to jog, dammit! She made her displeasure all the more clear by gently pushing people like myself out of her way and uttering frustrated grunts and harrumphs in the general direction of the offenders.
For being more clueless than the Jimmy Hoffa investigation.
For acting more entitled than Paris Hilton on Free Hot Wings for Coke Whores night.
And for wearing an expensive looking jogging outfit when all she really needed to be wearing was a t-shirt that read, "There is no I in team...but there is one smack dab in the middle of BITCH!"
We are proud to name the exasperated, harrumphing jogger of the Farmer's Market as this week's Rick and Len Show…WEENIE OF THE WEEK!
Here's a couple pics of the boar skull autographed by sweaty uncle Teddy that's just one of the prizes in the Jonah Hinds Benefit Raffle. Scroll down a bit for more details about the raffle, a list of some of the other prizes, info about Jonah and the place to click to buy your tickets now!
Jonah Hinds is an 11-year-old boy from Van Dyne who has quite literally been given his life back thanks to recent experimental brain surgery at American Family Medical Center in Madison.
Four years ago Jonah (known as Twitchy to family and friends) began suffering from uncontrollable shaking which made it impossible for him to sit through classes at school, services at church or any of what we consider "normal" childhood activities. He was diagnosed with a rare form of Tourette's Syndrome and the answer, at least for now, is deep brain stimulation. He's hooked up to a rechargeable battery that keeps the involuntary muscle movements to a minimum. Thankfully he's doing well but more surgeries will be needed and the Hinds family's insurance company refuses to pay for them.
That's why The Rick and Len Show and some great volunteers are conducting a benefit raffle for Jonah. We have compiled an extensive list of cool prizes, including one-of-a-kind autographed Ted Nugent items, cool electronic gizmos, retail gift cards, prize baskets and more. The prize list is growing daily. Check out a few highlights below.
The prize drawing will be held October 15, 2010 and winning numbers will be posted on this website (www.rickandlen.com).
Buy your tickets easily and securely through PayPal by simply clicking on the DONATE button below. Your donation amount will determine how many raffle ticket numbers we will assign. Your numbers will be sent to you via the email address you use when you donate.
Tickets are just $10 each, six for $50 or 13 for $100. Thanks for your support and good luck!
RAFFLE PRIZES (Only a few listed...more added each day)
*Wild Boar Skull signed by Ted Nugent. Value: priceless. Donated by: Austin Family. Boar was shot at Ted Nugent's Sunrize Acres in Michigan. Skull has been cleaned and bleached and autographed by Ted himself in March of 2010.
*Amazon Kindle DX Wireless Reading Device, Free 3G, 9.7" Display, Graphite, 3G Works Globally - Latest Generation. Donated by Women's Care of Wisconsin.
*Dlink Photo Frame. This isn't just a photo frame. This device connects directly with the internet through your Wi-Fi or Ethernet connection. It not only displays pictures but also top news stories, Facebook updates, and more! Your friends can even send a picture directly to this frame- no need for you to download pictures from an email and then transfer it to the frame. Donated by Cellcom. Two of these will be awarded.
*$100 Cellcom giftcard. Donated by Cellcom. Two of these will be awarded.
*Gander Mountain Fishing Package. Donated by Gander Mountain of Sheboygan.
*Autographed Ted Nugent Hunting Music 2-cd set of unreleased music the Nuge. Donated by Bill Austin.
*Fleet Farm Gift Card. Donated by Plymouth Fleet farm. Check out this video of Jonah's amazing journey!
105.7 WAPL, Wisconsin's Rock Station, is a 100,000 watt radio station serving Green Bay, Appleton, Oshkosh, and the surrounding communities in the Fox Valley and Northeast Wisconsin.
105.7 WAPL is also your FM home for Green Bay Packers football. Listen all season for complete Packers Radio Network game coverage from Wayne Larrivee and Larry McCarren.
The Rockin' Apple has spent over thirty years entertaining listeners through the music of artists like Led Zeppelin, Aerosmith, AC/DC, Ozzy Osbourne, Van Halen, Metallica, Pink Floyd, Motley Crue, and countless others - along with concerts, contests and the humor of the veteran morning duo of Rick and Len.
In 2008, WAPL won the prestigious Marconi Award for national Rock Station of the Year. WAPL has also been awarded Rolling Stone Magazine Reader's Choice Station five times (1990, 92, 93, 94, and 95). In 1999, the station won Radio and Records Small Market Rock Station of the Year, and in 2004 and 2006 won the Wisconsin Area Music Industry.