Madonna wants to have another natural-born baby. She\'s 51. In Great Britain they\'re allowing a 59-year-old woman to undergo in-vitro fertilization. Is this a good idea? We don\'t think so. Here are some signs that YOU MIGHT BE TOO OLD TO BE GIVING BIRTH!

*If your newborn has to learn how to change your diaper before you learn how to change his...you might be too old to be giving birth.

*If the only thing you have in comon with your newborn is the inability to chew solid food...you might be too old to be giving birth.

*If you can\'t breastfeed your baby because your milk is about a quarter-century past its expiration date...you might be too old to be giving birth.

*If you can breastfeed your baby because you\'re afraid you might bump him in the head with your knee...you might be too old to be giving birth.

*If your obstetrician opts for cesarean birth so your baby doesn\'t have to fight its way through cobwebs just to get out...you might be too old to be giving birth.

*If chances are pretty good that your hip will break before your water does...you might be too old to be giving birth.

*If you eve find yourself confusing a diaper bag with your colostomy bag...you might be too old to be giving birth.

*If you\'re hoping the baby is a boy just so you can name him "Matlock"...you might be too old to be giving birth.

*And if instead of crying, your baby comes out sneezing from all the dust...you\'re definitely too old to be giving birth!