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Interactive » Blogs
mar 27th
TOP TEN WAYS FOR GREEN BAY TO PAY THE $30,000 LEGAL BILL TO TRY TO REMOVE MAYOR SCHMITT FROM OFFICE.


10. Cut municipal spending by putting the mayor’s credit card in a top drawer.

9. Have city council host a fundraising brat fry with sausages obtained from Alderman Zima’s slacks.

8. Sell hot air from council sessions to wind farm.

7. Catch the mayor and steal his pot of gold.

6. Start a city council swear jar. For convenience, allow Alderman Zima to use direct deposit.

5. Shave the mayor’s eyebrows. Sell the hair to a company that makes toupees for balding chimps.

4. Let Alderman Wery look through accounts at the bank where he works and see who can spare a little cash.

3. That fellow just raised a lot of money wheelchair-ing from Janesville. Why not break the mayor’s legs, drop him 170 miles from home and see how he does?

2. Have Mayor and members of the city council take turns in charity dunk tank filled with lukewarm elephant piss.

1. Fittingly, enact half percent sales tax on douchebags.