Will Blackmon Tweeted earlier this week that 10 years ago, when he played for the Packers, they had a 4 game road losing streak and Coach McCarthy penalized them by making them stay in progressively worse hotels until they won. With the Packers now in the midst of an EIGHT game road losing streak, going back to last season, one can only wonder what kind of accommodations Mike has planned for them on their next road trip to Chicago.
FEATURES OF THE HOTEL THE PACKERS WILL STAY AT AFTER 8 ROAD LOSSES
10. The beds will be either lumpier than Rick’s ass or harder than Jared Fogel watching Dora the Explorer.
9. The fresh flowers in their rooms will still have the “In memoriam” ribbon attached.
8. The bedspreads will have enough DNA on them to clone your own pervert.
7. Every time someone urinates in the swimming pool it will make the water just a little cleaner.
6. The closest thing to art in the rooms will be the chalk body outlines on the floors.
5. Single team members will be offered the opportunity to avail themselves of the services of the dead hooker under their bed.
4. The only thing on the TV is videos of Mike Ditka doin’ it.
3. The bugs in the bed are bigger than the one up Len’s ass.
2. The soap in their showers will have been made by boiling the fatty remains of the room’s previous occupants.
1. The closest thing any of the rooms have to a hot shower is a sketchy maid who for 50 bucks will pee on you.