We are proud to name as this week’s Rick and Cutter show weenie of the week 41-year-old bicyclist Zach Walhovd from Rio. You see The Columbia County Sheriff’s Office received a call from a passing motorist earlier this week saying that they found a cyclist lying in a ditch on County Hwy B in the town of Lowville and thought maybe the person had been hit by a car. Well, he wasn’t hit by a car but he probably felt like he was hit by a truck the next day, or maybe even a train because he went on to steamroll anyone around him. When authorities arrived on the scene they realized very quickly that Mr. Walhovd was extremely intoxicated. When they tried to take him into custody, surprisingly, after multiple attempts to apprehend him, he resisted arrest. Allegedly he made servery threats to the deputies en route to a local hospital, then at the hospital, he hit one of the officers and kicked a nurse in the head! And trust me those nurses, especially at the hospital do not get paid enough to be kicked in the head by a drunk idiot. After all this, a Taser had to be used to subdue him, but that didn’t work as he continued to have outbursts even trying to get his blood and yes urine on the deputies. To make matters even better the Sheriff’s office should have seen this coming as at the time of his arrest Mr. Walhovd was out on felony bond after similar actions happened durring an investigation in the town of Wyocena on Feb. 29th. That’s right he’s now done this twice. No deputies or hospital staff were seriously injured in the process.
So for being on more substances while on a bicycle since Lance Armstrong’s last tour de France, for being more messed up on a bike since Syd Barrett wrote the classic The Piper at the Gates of Dawn era Pink Floyd song “Bike” and for trying to spread his DNA at a hospital faster than Nick Cannon at an orgy. We are proud to name the Laced Lowville Lowlife, 41-year-old buzzed bicyclist Zach Walhovd as this week’s Rick and Cutter show Weenie of the Week
