We are proud to name as this week’s Laura Lee and Cutter Weenie of the Week, the absolute moronic owner who masquerades as a GM in the NFL. That’s right, this week’s Weenie is Jerry Jones, owner of the Dallas Cowboys. I know what you’re thinking: how could someone in Texas who owns the fake America’s Team be named Weenie of the Week? Well, it’s simple, while his actions greatly increase the chances of the Packers winning a Super Bowl, if Dallas morning radio did a segment called Weenie of the Week, Jerry Jones would be Weenie of the year. On Thursday, rumors became facts when ole Jerry traded his best player, Defensive End and Sack master Micah Parsons is now a Green Bay Packer. Sure, Jerry gets two first-round picks, but after the Pack go to the Superbowl those picks are just glorified second-rounders anyway. Jerry also gets Packer defensive lineman Kenny Clark, and that one does hurt a little, but Kenny is no Micah. Jerry wants to be a gambler? Cool, well, the Packers are the cashiers, and they cashed in on this gamble to make their team the odds-on favorite in the NFC to make it to the promised land of Super Bowl champions, something the Cowboys haven’t done in over 30 years.
So for Jerry Jones, looking at the Luka Doncic trade and saying “hold my beer” For forgetting that you count your money when the deal is done and not while sitting at the table, and for making us Wisconsin sports fans climax in a puddle of football fluid.
We are proud to name the jacking jackass of a Cowboy Jerry Jones as this week’s Laura lee and cutter Weenie of the week.
